I like to think about things. I also like to question things – sometimes just for the sake of it.
I nerd myself into some things. Other things I am extremely uninterested in.
I have also become a climate change aunt, despite mine so far, in the context, young age.
On this blog you can read most of what fits in my world of thought. From social criticism to beauty 40+ to embarrassing stories to…
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Should be unique and unusual, should be so in as many ways as possible. However, this with heat intolerance is a variant I would like to refrain from, because it's so sickeningly fucking hard. Most people seem to enjoy summer and heat unabated, while I start to get tense and panic already at Christmas before the coming summer with associated high temperatures.
Enough to I really hate sweating (it's among the most disgusting I know), but the fact is that sweat is the least problem for me in summer. Everyone sweats when it's warm enough, and I actually do not think I necessarily sweat more or less than anyone else.
That, on the other hand happens to me, and that may not happen to everyone else, is that in the same way as most (including myself) can get cold right into the marrow in winter, then I get hot right through when it's hot for a long time. One or a couple of days is mostly just hard work, but the body does not have time to get warm right through at that time. If the heat continues and continues, However, my whole body gets hot through the marrow, ben, meat, Blood, the whole thing. Once it gets cool, it can take me several days to cool enough so that I regain some kind of normal balance between external and internal temperature.
But it is still not what's the worst. The everyones, the worst thing is that my whole existence is all about survival. Nothing else. It's about surviving from the moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep. There are many hours in between. The whole me, both body, intellect, Soul, do you go into survival mode. I lose all physical strength, I can not think – it is as if my whole world of thought is wrapped in thick layers (plural!) of cotton wool and I do not have access to the thoughts that are actually fun and rewarding to have.
In addition, min body's ability to stay in shape. It may sound a little ridiculous, but it's actually true. Usually my body looks and feels a certain way. In the summer I will be.. not necessarily swollen, but sloppy and shapeless. It is as if the very shape of the body is melting.
I can not take it do nothing at all except the most necessary, which right now is going out with the dog, stand up long enough to take a shower, Cook (late at night), do my yoga (and it kind of takes all the power I have), wash and wash my compression socks. And, blogging I can do – obviously. Watch TV shows and read a book. Sedentary chores where I do not have to think too much. All energy goes to withstand the heat.
Everything else gets wait. Vacuuming has to wait until it's cooler and I can do it without having to mop up sweat from the floors. All other cleaning must wait. Training of the dog to any greater extent than five minutes here and there must wait. Because I do not fix it, quite simply.
It should be added that while everything I have described is as it is, so it has partly to do with how I live. I live on the third floor of a stone house where the heat rises and gathers on my floor (and in the attic). I do not have a car either, and going from me to the nearest bath is way too far in this heat. Given Covid and the heat, I'll be reluctant to take the bus if I do not absolutely, necessarily must. So I'm pretty locked in at home, if I do not want to go out and hang out with the old women who occupy the farm from morning to evening throughout the summers.
If I lived as I want to live – in a house in the country, it would probably be something completely different. I still would not enjoy the summer, but it might be more manageable. Now I mostly sit inside in front of the fans, with proximity to running, cold water, shower, toilet, plus ways to maintain my overcooked brain. Should I take Boyo out?, I need to pack stuff to keep us both entertained if we're going to sit down somewhere. It will be too big a project, and far too hard to keep up with in the heat.
Am I lazy? No, I'm heat intolerant. I do not have diabetes or any other disease that makes me unable to handle heat. I do not know what it is due to. It's just that. My body and heat are not a good combination, quite simply. This is something I have learned to accept.
And if anyone thinking that I should shower hot and drink hot to balance external and internal temperature; it does not necessarily work for me. I drink hot tea per se, I do. But taking a hot shower goes away completely. I shower cool, but not cold. I do not believe in heating up my body further, when all it wants is to lower the temperature.
Then I will in the name of honesty also say that I do not like cold either. I have an extremely small range when it comes to temperature, where I really thrive. Somewhere in between 10 – 13 degrees is probably my absolute favorite. I can imagine stretching down to -5 grader, depending on the season. But my biggest favorite time of the year is autumn. In any case, as autumn looked like before, with high, clear air, blue sky, sol – and the enormous splendor of color in the trees. I like to be able to dress so that I feel good-looking, with jacket and full shoes, without freezing or sweating. And so I love the dark, chilly evenings.
Neither is true summertime. Instead, it is several months where my only task in life is to survive. For me, it really is sitting down time, because I do not fix to be active at all.
So right now I suffer the most. It feels a little overdramatic to put it that way, but that's exactly how it is. The thing about going out and meeting friends is completely out of the question. I meet a friend who lives in the same neighborhood as me, it may as well be enough. It is too hot and too expensive to sit and take the bus, and – I can not take it. That's right, way too hard. It's bad enough the times I have to go down to Specsavers for the sake of the glasses.
(( And speaking of them, so I have been there and handed in both pairs to get single cut glass instead of progressive. It really does not work for me. ))
And because it here happens to be my blog, and I also believe that whining is an extremely effective way of relieving pressure, so I'm going to be fine with whining. Believe me when I say that; it is far from a high to walk around a few days into the heat and feel sick with recurring headaches, inability to think, inability to move faster than a snail, to constantly feel as if the skin is the only organ that stands between me and the heat – and believe me just as much when I say that it takes an enormous amount of force to withstand the heat when one's body does not like it. I also find it terribly difficult to be more or less ready to cry on certain days because it never stops being hot, and because the air is so sticky and humid that I do not know if I am damp from sweat or because the air is so disgusting.
It exists as well nowhere to go. And then this summer is still far from as disgusting as it was 2018.
Even if I is so terribly awkwardly set for the summer, there are some things I am grateful for. I am grateful that I have working electricity at home. I'm grateful I have my fans, despite the fact that electricity bills are becoming much more expensive. I'm grateful I have a fridge and a freezer. I am grateful that I have a working computer with associated Internet, so that I can find pastimes. I am also extremely grateful that I have access to cold water. Without all this, a thousand would know if I was to survive. For real, in other words.